There is a dangerous place you can find yourself without even realizing it, a place where work becomes everything. It stops being just a job and slowly takes over your entire life. Work becomes the top priority above your health, your family, your children, and even your own sanity. I know this place well because I lived there for over ten years.
For a little over a decade, I dedicated myself completely to my job in transportation. If you know anything about that field, you know it’s twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, non-stop. Phones ringing at all hours, urgent situations that had to be resolved immediately, and the constant pressure to keep things running smoothly. It was a small company, and because of that, I wore many hats; office manager, accountant, HR, safety coordinator. You name it, I did it.
At first, I thought this was just what hard work looked like. I believed that sacrificing myself was part of being loyal and dependable. I convinced myself that being available at all times was the mark of a good employee and a responsible person. What I didn’t see was how slowly this was consuming me. My identity became wrapped up entirely in my role at work, and the more I gave, the more it demanded.
Over time, the cost of that devotion became too high. I began to break down mentally, emotionally, and physically. I experienced anxiety and panic attacks. Even when I was home, my mind wasn’t there, it was still stuck at work. The sound of the work phone ringing would send waves of anxiety through me. I couldn’t escape it, not even in my dreams.
In over ten years, I think I called in sick only once. When I had to leave for a doctor’s appointment or one of my kids’ school events, I would rush back to finish the day. Even my vacations revolved around work. If we planned time away, it was always scheduled around what was best for the company. I was supposed to be on vacation but I was still working, taking calls, solving problems, checking in constantly. I never really got a break, and neither did my family. Looking back, I realize now that I had given my whole self away to something that could never truly give back.
My marriage suffered deeply during this time. My husband would remind me over and over, “It’s not your company,” but I couldn’t see it that way. In my mind, everything that happened at work was my responsibility. If something went wrong, I felt it was my job to fix it. I let that mindset create distance between us. Arguments became common, and resentment grew because I was never fully present. I thought I was doing the right thing by being so dedicated, but in reality, I was pushing away the very person who was trying to help me see the truth.
About nine months ago, while I was still at that job and completely overwhelmed, I finally gave my life to Christ. It was in my darkest season, when I felt completely broken and defeated, that I realized I couldn’t do it alone anymore. Psalm 34:18 says, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” God met me right there in the middle of my exhaustion and pain. He opened my eyes to the fact that my worth wasn’t tied to my job, a title, or a paycheck. My worth was in Him.
Since getting closer to God, I had been praying and asking Him to take me out of that job if it wasn’t where I was meant to be. I remember praying, “Let it be Your will, Father, not mine.” Deep down, I think God knew I wouldn’t walk away on my own, no matter how heavy the burden became. I was too deeply attached, too used to carrying it all. But, three weeks ago, the company suddenly closed down. Just like that, the place I had poured myself into for over a decade was gone. In that moment, I realized it was His way of moving me out of a place I never would have left by choice. It was painful, but it was also His direct answer to my prayer.
I had always dreamed of the day when I wouldn’t have to hear that phone ring, when I could finally breathe, and I imagined it would feel freeing. But instead, it’s been an emotional whirlwind, filled with guilt, anger, and sadness. Guilt because I sacrificed so much of my family and my life for a job that no longer exists. Anger at myself for allowing it to have that kind of hold over me. Sadness because, for so long, this was all I knew, and now it’s gone.
Being home now, I see clearly how much I missed over the years. The everyday moments that I thought I could always make up for later, but later never came. I was recently watching a show where a father called his son to apologize for missing his game. Then, I saw a documentary where a man missed his daughter’s graduation because of work. Both of those moments hit me like a punch to the chest. It made me realize how I had done the same thing, telling myself work was important, but in reality, those moments with my children were priceless, and once they were gone, they were gone forever.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.” For so long, my entire season was dedicated to work, and it was completely out of balance. I thought I was being a good provider, but in truth, I was missing out on the very life I was working so hard to support.
To anyone reading this who might be in the same place I was, I want to tell you something straight from my heart: no job is worth losing yourself, your family, or your faith. Matthew 6:33 reminds us, “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” God is the true provider. When you trust Him, He will meet your needs far beyond what any job can offer.
These past three weeks at home have been bittersweet. It hurts deeply to see how much I missed, but I am also thankful that my children are still young, and there is still time to change. I can’t get back the years I lost, but I can be present now. I can listen, love, and be there in ways I wasn’t before. And most importantly, I can continue to grow in my faith and let God lead my steps.
Some days, I still wake up feeling a little lost without the constant busyness of work. There are moments when guilt creeps in, and I replay all the times I wasn’t there for my family. But each day is a new chance to do better, to be better, and to walk in alignment with God’s plan.
Jobs will come and go. Companies will open and close. But your children only get one childhood. Your spouse only gets one partner in this life. And you only get one soul. I can’t change the past, but I can definitely live differently now. My prayer is that you don’t have to go through what I went through to realize what truly matters. If you’re stuck in a job that’s taking over your life, step back and ask yourself, “What am I missing right now?” Because those missed moments don’t come back.
Let God be your guide. Trust Him to provide for your needs. And don’t let work define you because you are worth so much more than a job title or a paycheck. At the end of the day, faith, family, and love are what truly last. Everything else fades away.
I encourage you to pause and truly reflect. What moments are slipping through your fingers because work has taken over your time and energy? Is it a bedtime story, a family dinner, a heartfelt conversation, or simply being present with the ones you love? Jobs will always demand more, but the people you love won’t always be there waiting. Think carefully about whether the sacrifices you’re making today are worth the memories you might never get back.
Holy mess 